Tuesday, December 02, 2008

PopeTarts™ and Popesicles™: NEW ecumenical booster merchandise!

You may purchase these tasteful PopeTarts™ and Popesicles™ by contacting the merchandise department in the comment box. A nice feature of the PopeTarts™ ($50 for pack of ten – plus free cardboard packaging): if you squeeze them in the middle, it repeats a variety of liturgical exclamations in Latin (remove electronic device before consuming). There are a variety of tastes to suit your ecumenical desire, from plain old chocolate to honey glazed barbequed cherub.

The Popesicles™, at just $15 a pack*, are made to taste of incense smoke. Other flavours will be made available in the new year.

We are presently working on Prayer Beads that double up as an Mp3 player, and statues of the Virgin Mary with moving eyes.

* Contains 1 Popesicle. May contains nuts, snot, hair, ice, dairy products or meat.


Wednesday, October 24, 2007

A cure for the old ‘evil PC’ problem

Someone searches Google for "Jesus Please remove the evil from my PC". Steven responds.

I suggest the seeker try my own holy water. Indeed, I am able to ship at a moment's notice - to any country - my very own 'CTRVHM Holy Phlegm™' if anyone is interested. Sprinkle on infected areas to deliver from all the forces of darkness. A bargain at just 40$ per shot (all small fragments of half-chewed toast come free of charge).


Tuesday, June 26, 2007

Tasteful Chrisendom Merchandise

Don't look at me like that!

No I didn't make it.

And you're just jealous if you even thought I did.

Anyway, you know you want one.

Plus, it’s partly made of asbestos, so if you are a sinner like James Crossley it could prove useful.

For a mere 50 British Pounds / 100 US dollars / 75 euro, it can be yours! Just think how impressed all of your friends will be!

Quickly click here to make you 'love donation' to Chris Tilling Really Very Holy Ministries (CTRVHM).

(Care of http://scotteriology.wordpress.com/2007/06/25/t-shirts/!)